13 Questions: Natallia Nemes

Natallia Nemes is a writer/blogger at Shit101.com, where she gives advice based on her many interesting life experiences. Check her out at the links below!

1. Who are you and where are you from?
My name is Natallia Nemes and I am from the East Coast..Fort Lauderdale, Fl then Wilmington NC, Madrid Spain, NYC and now Los Angeles baby!!!!

2. Where might people know you from?
Shit101.com

3. When it comes to what you do, who or what are your major influences?
Life and all the bullshit that comes along with it!

4. What four peoples' faces would you put on your own personal Mt. Rushmore?
Homer Simpson, George Washington Carver, Louis C.K., Britney Spears (the bald version)

5. What's the last album you bought?
The 20/20 Experience By Justin Timberlake

6. What are the last movies you saw in theaters and on DVD/Blu-Ray?
Movie Theaters: Zero Dark Thirty

DVD: Celest And Jesse Forever

7. What's the last podcast you listened to?
NPR's Jason Bentley's "Morning Becomes Ecletic"

 
8. What's the last video game you played?
Tetris

9. What's the last book you read?

What's Your Poo Telling You? by Josh Richman and gastroenterologist Anish Sheth, M.D.

10. What are you favorite sports teams?

LA Kings!

11. What cartoon or comic book character can you relate to the most?

The Little Mermaid

12. Create a playlist of ten songs that give people an idea of your musical taste.
"House of Cards" - Radiohead

"Strawberry Bubblegum" -Justin Timberlake

"Bounce"-Iggy Azalea

"Beautiful Drug" -Thievery Corporation

"Bitch, Don't Kill My Vibe" -Kendrick Lamar

"Blue In Green" -Miles Davis

"Pour It Up" -Rhianna

"A Restencia Nunca Morre" - Urban Response

"6am" - Fitz and The Tantrums

"First Of The Year" -Skrillex

13. If you could spend the day at an amusement park with one person from the entertainment industry, who would it be and why? 

Snoop Dog....who else!?

LINKS:

Shit101.com - @NatalliaNemes on Twitter

Shit101.com on Facebook

Texas Chainsaw (2013)

Directed by John Luessenhop. Starring Alexandra Daddario ("Heather Miller"), Dan Yeager ("Leatherface"), Trey Songz ("Ryan"), and Scott Eastwood ("Carl"). Rated R.

Source: Region 1 DVD (Lionsgate)
Running time: 01:31:51
Country: USA

Tobe Hooper's original TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE isn't just my favorite Horror movie of all time - it's my favorite movie of all time period. I haven't seen it hundreds of times, and I can't quote the entire movie or describe it to someone frame-by-frame, but I can't stress the importance of TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE enough as it pertains to my overall love of cinema. However, despite holding the original in the highest regard, I'm not one of those people who damned the remake when it came out. In fact, I saw it on opening night with some friends and it went down as one of the funnest experiences I've ever had in a movie theater, but maybe I'll talk about that if I ever end up reviewing the Platinum Dunes remake one of these days. That being said, regardless of having an open mind, TEXAS CHAINSAW (released in theaters as TEXAS CHAINSAW 3D) has always looked like an absolute trainwreck for a number of reasons.

Rarely have I walked out of a movie theater after seeing something in 3D and thought to myself: "Wow, that was totally worth my hard-earned money!" To me, it's all just a scam to charge more money at the box office. That would be fine if filmmakers actually exploited 3D to its fullest potential. But hey, I'm not a filmmaker, so what the fuck do I know? Anyway, the whole point I'm trying to make is that 3D is pretty fucking pointless, and it has the opposite effect on me in terms of it being a selling point; I'll go out of my way not to see something in 3D on the big screen if I can help it. And when it comes to mainstream horror movies, 3D is usually a huge red flag for me, which is why I was a bit apprehensive about this particular film from the start. Oh, and there's also the track record of shitty mainstream horror to come out in the last few years, but that's a rant for another time. Ugh.

What TEXAS CHAINSAW does is disregard everything after Tobe Hooper's original and establish itself as a direct sequel, but it should be noted that it takes liberties with the original as well. After a montage of footage from the original TEXAS CHAIN SAW MASSACRE (basically a highlight reel of its death scenes and iconic imagery), we get a DEVIL'S REJECT-esque shootout at the infamous Sawyer house that picks up not too long after Sally Hardesty escaped the clutches of the fucked-up Sawyer family. There's a stand-off with a single cop, who simply asks that Leatherface surrender to the police. Oh, and instead of just the three original remaining members of the Sawyer clan, there are a whole shit-load of people in the house, including a woman holding a baby that's supposedly fathered by Drayton Sawyer (Bill Moseley, who replaces the deceased Jim Siedow).

Long story short, shit doesn't turn out well for the Sawyers, and the baby - a girl - is rescued by a married redneck couple who subsequently raise it as their own. Cut to approximately 20 years later, and now the little Sawyer girl has grown up to be a beautiful young woman named Heather. The people who raised her went all those years without telling her the truth, but she eventually finds out everything when she gets word of her biological Grandmother passing away and leaving the tragic Sawyer house in her name. So Heather and her friends hit the road, pick up a hitch-hiker, and check out the Sawyer house, only to find that our old buddy Leatherface is still dwelling there.

One of the things that piqued my interest about the film before it came out was the rumor that it would include footage from the original. I was very curious to see how they'd incorporate said footage, and I think they did a pretty good job with it. It was more or less an info-dump of imagery for a new generation of people who may not have seen the original, but I saw it as a nice trip down memory lane. And, to be fair, at least they didn't try to recreate the original with new actors and newly-shot footage like the FRIDAY THE 13TH reboot/remake/sequel thing from 2009. For continuity's sake, though, they were forced to replace Jim Siedow with Bill Moseley essentially re-enacting Siedow's scenes from the original so that they could feature his character in this film.

To anyone who's a fan of the franchise, it's a bit jarring to see Bill Moseley playing "Cook" considering we all know him for playing Chop-Top in TEXAS CHAINSAW MASSACRE 2, but if there's anyone who should've taken over for Siedow, it's Bill Moseley. Plus, it gave the filmmakers a chance to feature yet another person from TCM mythology in a cameo. Also appearing in TEXAS CHAINSAW are Gunnar Hansen (the original Leatherface), Marilyn Burns (Sally Hardesty from the original TCM), and John Dugan (Grandpa from the original TCM). With the exception of Marilyn Burns (who I honestly didn't even spot), all of the aforementioned actors appear in the opening shootout scene at the Sawyer house, but Dugan is the only person to reprise his role, which, to me, is quite the fucking Easter Egg.

I haven't read any reviews of TEXAS CHAINSAW aside from one that Christine posted at Paracinema, but the general word-of-mouth has been bad. In fact, I don't think I've ever heard anyone defend this movie. As much as I'm inclined to be contrary, I won't be defending this movie either, but I didn't think it was as bad as I was led to believe. One of the biggest complaints I've heard from acquaintances who have seen it is the continuity issues. The original TCM took place in the early 70s, which means that the character of Heather would be almost 40 years-old by this point. And the film makes it perfectly clear that this particular story takes place in present-day, so we as viewers can't even pretend that it's set in the 90s (which would be more accurate). To the film's credit, though, they don't reveal the year that the shootout at the beginning of the movie took place, which goes back to what I said about liberties being taken with the original's story. I can understand why people would be annoyed by this, but remakes/reboots have committed far worse crimes in the past, which is why I wasn't particularly bothered by it.

I felt TEXAS CHAINSAW had the potential to be pretty good, all things considered. The characters were pretty stupid and annoying except for Heather, but they're all irrelevant for the most part, and they don't exactly overstay their welcome if you know what I mean. Speaking of Heather, one of the main draws of this movie for me was actress Alexandra Daddario, who I've been crushing on ever since BEREAVEMENT. I think she did a good job in this, but to be completely honest, I was too mesmerized by her beauty to notice her acting. Whoops! All kidding aside, for a horror movie that simply requires lots of screaming and running and crying, Alexandra did a pretty good job. Another actor who I didn't really know anything about beforehand and was impressed with in this was Paul Rae, who essentially plays the film's villain. Dan Yeager, I suppose, did a decent enough job of carrying the torch and swingin' the saw, but the ultimate pay-off with Leatherface in the film left me a bit bewildered. I'll just leave it at that.

As I said, the potential was there, but when it's all said and done, TEXAS CHAINSAW shits the bed in one of the most crucial of areas: the writing. The screenplay was written by three people, and one of them is the man responsible for JASON GOES TO HELL, just to give you an idea of the quality here. And despite the fact that the film doesn't really follow up the original with a noteworthy amount of continuity, I really like where they went with the characters, and it seems like they writers had a solid outline and idea of what they wanted to do. For the most part they succeeded, but, without getting into details, the final product makes it easy to nit-pick and criticize. Again, good ideas and lots of potential for something fresh and exciting, but that's about where it ends. At the end of the day, though, this is a perfectly watchable slasher movie that didn't bore me or leave me frustrated by the time it was over. Go into it with very low expectations and I think you'll feel the same way.

Score: 6

Thoughts on DEXTER Season 7

WARNING: This post contains SPOILERS for Season 6 and some mild spoilers for Season 7.

I rarely stray from the traditional review and just write about shit like TV shows, so I thought I'd sit down and just spew whatever comes to mind in regards to the latest season of DEXTER. This is more or less, however, a review of the season and my general thoughts and opinions of it.

I can't remember the last time I had Showtime, so I've been keeping up with DEXTER as it's been coming out on DVD. I've been consistently keeping up since the first season, though, which is something I can't say about many shows. DEXTER being a part of my life for the last six years has pretty much been the only reason I haven't given up on it yet. I've gradually watched the characters grow and develop, I've ironically rooted for the character of Dexter despite him being a murderer, and I've seen characters who I've grown to like (and dislike) get the ceremonious farewell treatment via a knife to the sternum. And, with it widely known that the next season will be the last, I have to say that I'm a bit sad to see one of my favorite shows being put to rest. On the other hand I'm also relieved that the end is near, but I'll get to that later.

Season 6 ended with a huge cliffhanger. Speaking of which, one of the things I've always loved about DEXTER is that the cliffhangers have been consistently great. And what's even better is that the show actually follows through with them instead of doing the whole "psych-out" thing that TV shows like TRUE BLOOD have a tendency to do. But anyway, yeah, the ending of season 6. I won't exactly elaborate on it even though I posted a "Spoiler Alert", but I'll just say: what happened at the end of season 6 was inevitable. Dexter was bound to slip up, or at least be in the wrong place at the wrong time. It still doesn't take away from the "holy shit" factor of it though.

The ending of season 6 was so huge (and, at the time, the show's highest rated episode and, I believe, the highest rated episode of any Showtime original series period) that it took this season two whole episodes to deal with the aftermath of it. That said, the first two episodes of this season were pretty great - especially the season premiere, which now holds the record as the highest-rated episode of any Showtime original series.

That said, I was very curious to see what they'd do with Deb and how they'd have her react to finding Dexter about to kill someone in his ritualistic fashion. On the other hand, how would Dexter react? Would Deb do her job and arrest him? Would Dexter be willing to go so far as to kill his own sister just to protect his secret? After all, Dexter spent six seasons covering his tracks and killing anyone who got too close and threatened to expose him, so who's to say that he won't instinctively murder Deb and spend the rest of the series dealing with the guilt of that? In doing so, however, he'd be breaking his code, but anyone who watched this season knows that the "code" holds very little meaning to Dexter now, especially with his revelations throughout this season in regards to his "Dark Passenger".

Ultimately, I'm glad that they went in the direction they did with Deb and Dexter. It was the logical and "safe" direction to go, but it makes more sense for the both of them to have this event hanging over their heads. It also gives the show an opportunity to question their bond and test their loyalty to each other throughout the season, and it has even more of an impact with two things in mind: 1) Deb's promotion, which gives her more responsibility and more of a reason to be by-the-book, and 2) the revelation at the end of season 6 in regards to Deb's true feelings about her brother.

With that aside, let's get to the supporting characters and the obligatory guest star. In the past, both the guest stars and the sinister characters that come into the picture and pose a threat to Dexter have ranged anywhere from "great" to "underwhelming". With this season, as far as new characters being introduced, we have yet another love interest for Dexter in the form of Hannah McKay (Yvonne Strahovski), who's sort of a Black Widow type of character. Personally, I've been done with the whole recurring theme of Dexter having a complicated love interest since season 5 when Julia Stiles on. For someone who's so insistent on detaching himself from people, Dexter sure has a lot of girlfriends, but I suppose that's just the human side of him showing. Eventually loneliness and a feeling to connect with someone takes its toll on even the most reclusive of people. But yeah, the way in which Hannah's character ultimately affected Dexter and those around him was a bit predictable, but it resulted in some great moments of tension nonetheless - especially towards the end of the season when things take a turn with Hannah.

As far as the "special guest star", we have Ray Stevenson, who, I have to say, was a terrific addition to the show. I've always liked Stevenson and found him to be really good in spite of some of the films he's been in, but he's never been an actor who I go out of my way to see in movies and shows. Stevenson is superb here, though, and, most importantly, his character doesn't overstay his welcome. His character - a person of power in the Ukranian mob - not only serves his purpose but also creates an interesting contrast to Dexter as the two occasionally cross paths. Their relationship to each other was one of those relationships where you really wish they'd stop opposing each other and join forces because of how well their chemistry is, but alas. In any event, Stevenson is excellent, and I think the sub-plot involving the mob was handled well and did a good job of getting other supporting characters involved.

In the context of me watching the series as a marathon as opposed to watching the episodes on a weekly basis (I powered through this season in just under 48 hours), I have to say that it meandered quite a bit at times in between the opening episodes and the finale, but not as much as in the last season or two. There weren't more than a handful of times I can recall with this season where I thought to myself "Holy shit, I absolutely need to see the next episode right now!", but overall it kept me interested enough to not want to take a break or move on to something else, which is something I certainly can't say about the two seasons prior to this. I dug the assortment of serial killers that were incorporated into this season seemingly for the sake of the show's pacing.

You can tell this season was written with the end of the series in mind, because all bets are off, which is especially evident by the time the season comes to its shocking conclusion. That said, this isn't a typical season of the show, and there's a nice balance of everything that has made the show great up to this point combined with a lingering feeling that everything could go off the rails at any point. Instead of figuring out absurd ways to extend Dexter's bloody reign as a homicidal anti-hero, they're throwing damn near everything at the wall and seeing what sticks. No one is safe.

Overall, a very watchable season and a step up from the last few. I think I'd even go so far as to say that this is in the top three for me if I were to rank the seasons, but I'd really have to re-watch the first three before I could even begin to consider ranking them. The highlights for me as far as the performances are Jennifer Carpenter and Ray Stevenson. Carpenter (who I've always liked but has a tendency to get on my nerves at times) is pretty amazing in this and clearly puts so much emotion into her performance. And, despite the fact that he's kind of a douchebag, the character of Quinn has really grown on me in the last couple of seasons. When it's all said and done, I'm really curious to see where Quinn in particular stands. As far as Batista, the seeds are already planted at this point for his character to get some closure, but who knows; that could all change considering the final moments of this season.

Possession (1981)

Directed by Andrzej Zulawski. Starring Isabelle Adjani ("Anna", "Helen"), Sam Neill ("Mark"), Margit Carstensen ("Margit Gluckmeister"), and Heinz Bennet ("Heinrich"). Rated R.

Source: Region 1 DVD (Anchor Bay)
Running time: 02:03:33
Country: France, West Germany

When we're introduced to the two leads of POSSESSION, Anna and Mark, it's very apparent that their marriage is in trouble. In fact, the film wastes no time in letting us no that it's beyond the point of any repair whatsoever. Mark - a spy who works for the government - returns home to Berlin from a mission to discover that Anna has suddenly decided she wants to file for divorce. The way that Mark initially responds is a bit strange. Anna is absolutely hysterical (a trait that she maintains throughout the film more often than not), whereas Mark's reaction to the situation (and to her) is almost robotic, in that he seems very emotionless, blunt, and seemingly unsympathetic but surprised by her choice nonetheless. From this point, we as viewers, whether we want to or not, are thrown into a situation where we not only bear witness to the disintegration of their relationship but fall down a spiral of emotions (and violence) with them as well.

When it comes to film as art as opposed to a product designed to make money, I don't think there should be any limit to how personal an artist should get with his or her work. To be fair, though, there's a certain line that's inevitably crossed when a filmmaker gets a bit too personal, and it's a line that results in the film inherently become a too inaccessible. That being said, POSSESSION comes across as a very personal film for director Andrzej Zulawski. He's even gone on record as saying so himself, but anyone would still be able to tell just based on the merits of the movie alone. POSSESSION isn't a plot-driven film per se, but rather a character study and the document of an invisible force pulling two people in a relationship apart into territories of insanity and emotional instability. For those who've seen Lars Von Trier's ANTICHRIST, you could say that POSSESSION is like its older sibling. Both films share a lot of the same traits and themes, and both are arguably just as unpleasant as the other.

To those of you reading this who haven't seen POSSESSION, if you go into it expecting a cohesive narrative, you'll more than likely be confused by what you're watching. The film doesn't go out of its way to spell everything out for you to understand. As pretentious as it sounds, you have to look a lot deeper than what's on the surface of this film, and it's up to you to gather the pieces of the puzzle and assemble them yourself rather than having the director and actors and script do it for you. I mean, I'm not saying that this is one of the most complicated movies you'll ever see, but there's still a lot going on in this movie that perhaps will only resonate with people with a profound understanding of relationships and human psychology.

Speaking of psychology, one of the interesting things about the film (for me anyway) is the back and forth between Anna and Mark. One more than a couple of occasions, their roles are essentially reversed as the verbal attacker and the one who finds themselves in a defensive position. At one point, Anna becomes to one who's emotionally cold while Mark assumes the role of the hysterical one, only for the them to switch up again for seemingly no reason. It's almost like a power-struggle between the two, with both sides using whatever psychological and emotional warfare they can muster. The crumbling of their relationship is truly a spectacle to behold, as are the amazing performances by both Adjani and Neill. Adjani in particular is an absolute wreck in this film. Prior to seeing this, she never struck me as someone so capable of such an intense, physically-draining performance as the one she gives here. If there's only one thing you'll take away from this movie, chances are it'll be how awe-inspiring Adjani's performance is.

So, when Mark and Anna aren't fighting, POSSESSION is chock-full of unusual, intriguing, and downright bizarre moments. Mark hires a Private Investigator to follow Anna, which leads to some startling discoveries on the Investigator's part to say the least. Anna retreats to a dilapidated building and creates a companion for herself that defies biology. Mark meets a doppelganger of Anna who's the polar opposite of her in terms of personality (or so it seems). Mark confronts "the other guy". I'm sure anyone who's been cheated on by someone they've invested a lot of emotion in, at one point, has suffered a fair amount of anxiety when it comes to thoughts of "the other guy" or "the other girl". Thoughts of confronting this person and, in some cases, the visual reveal of this other person is one of the most difficult things to deal with when someone you love separates themselves from you, and this is one of the many aspects of a failed relationship that POSSESSION addresses in its own way. While "the other guy" in this film is essentially portrayed with the intent of being made a mockery of by Zulawski, the whole point, it seems, is that the idea of this other person causes one to panic and question their own flaws as a human being and as a lover.

POSSESSION isn't the most well-paced film (I can't speak for everyone, but I certainly felt all two-hours of its running time), but it's an amazingly-acted and well-constructed film. If you don't get any fulfillment out of this movie in terms of its overall watchability, I'll be shocked if you aren't at least impressed with it from a technical standpoint. The muted color scheme seems very calculated and goes hand-in-hand with the dreary Berlin setting. The camera is constantly moving in a way that doesn't distract, or come across as flamboyant for the sake of it, so much as it compliments the high level of hysteria amongst the characters. While great, the style of acting is a bit strange though. The performances from pretty much everyone are like a cross between melodrama and watching someone having an intense Acid trip. Because of the minimal amount of characters, the relationship of the leads, the dialogue, and the way the actors are shot, POSSESSION seems like an adaptation of a stage play.

There's so much more to talk about when it comes to this film. I could literally dissect it from start to finish and throw my opinions and interpretations in your direction until my fingers bleed, but I'll spare you. I personally wouldn't call POSSESSION a masterpiece, but - with all due respect to SPIDER BABY - it's one of the maddest films I've ever seen. If intense psychological horror movies about doomed relationships are of interest to you, this is a film that you absolutely need to see.

Score: 8

13 Questions: Rodrigo Obón

This week's 13 Questions guest is an amazing artist who I've known through Facebook for around a year now. Not only is he super talented, but he also has quite the collection of movie memorabilia! You can see some of his art right here in this post and at the link to Rodrigo's site below.

1. Who are you and where are you from?
I was born in Chile but I've been living in Sweden since I was 14.

2. Where might people know you from?
I'm quite locally known: People here in my hometown know me for a couple of things. First of all for my illustrations, I had a bunch of exhibitions and I designed the logos for a couple of bars and coffeeshops. Second: I used to run a local film club that showed exploitation and cult films. It was hard work keeping that thing running since I did everything myself, I booked the films, cut trailers that were shown before the movies and, of course,  drew the posters. I was getting burned out so I'm taking a break from that at the moment. Third: I wrote the screenplay for a couple of short movies, one of which won a bunch of awards and was shown in Swedish national television.

3. When it comes to what you do, who or what are your major influences?
My major influence is old movie poster art, I love illustrated posters. Saul Bass, Drew Struzan, Bob Peak and a whole bunch of italian poster artists. Loooove italian poster art! I also get a lot of inspiration from movies and music.

4. What four peoples' faces would you put on your own personal Mt. Rushmore?
Robert Ryan, Lee Marvin, Charles Bronson and Warren Oates.

5. What's the last album you bought?
Drokk - Music Inspired by Mega City One - Geoff Barrow/Ben Salsbury. A John Carperter-sounding electronic record inspired by the Judge Dredd comics

6. What are the last movies you saw in theaters and on DVD/Blu-Ray?
The last movie I saw in the theaters was, sadly, The Great Gatsby. The last DVD I saw was Tight Spot, a noir starring Edward G.Robinson, Brian Keith and Ginger Rogers.

7. What's the last podcast you listened to?
WTF With Marc Maron - ep. 388 - Noah Baumbach

8. What's the last video game you played?
I'm not a video game fan so the last time I tried to play one was Tomb Raider 3 I think. I don't have the patience to play those things.

9. What's the last book you read?
Murrow: His Life and Times by A.M. Sperber.

10. What are you favorite sports teams?
I don't care for sports so I don't have any. My father is quite disappointed in this as he is a huge Soccer fan and would love to spend some sports related quality time with his son. Sorry dad.

11. What cartoon or comic book character can you relate to the most?
Daffy Duck

12. Create a playlist of ten songs that give people an idea of your musical taste.
Ennio Morricone: Citta' Violenta
Frank Sinatra: The World We Knew (Over and over)
Charles Mingus: II B.S.
Franco Micalizzi; Roma a Mano Armata
Lalo Scifrin: Bullitt - Main Title
Miles Davis: Springsville
Buddy Rich: Brainwashed
David Shire: The Taking of Pelham One, Two, Three - main Title
Tangerine Dream: Dr. Destructo
Francesco De Masi & Maurizio Graf: Find a Man

13. If you could spend the day at an amusement park with one person from the entertainment industry, who would it be and why?
Ennio Morricone. I think it would be a disaster as he seems to be quite a cranky old dude, but I wouldn't mind if he chewed me out as long as I got to meet him.

LINK:

Rodrigo Obón Illustration

Future Kick (1991)

Directed by Damian Klaus. Starring Don "The Dragon" Wilson ("Walker"), Meg Foster ("Nancy"), Chris Penn ("Bang"), and Eb Lottimer ("Hynes"). Rated R.

Source: Region 1 DVD (New Concorde)
Running time: 01:12:07
Country: USA

FUTURE KICK is set in a dystopic future where a large number of wealthy humans have moved to the Moon, leaving the scum of society to exist on Earth under the control of megacorporations. Said megacorporations have developed human-like robots known as Cyberons to keep the shitty humans on Earth in check. However, due to what seems like a lack of interest, the Cyberons are eventually phased out and eliminated, which is where lead character Walker comes into play. He was apparently a bad-ass Cyberon who went into hiding and now works as a bounty hunter. His help is eventually sought out by a Moon resident named Nancy, who's cheating-ass husband, while visiting Earth, was killed by shady members of a corporation known as New Body.

So, FUTURE KICK was sort of a leftover movie I had intended to watch when I went through a Cyberpunk/Sci-Fi phase a month or so ago, and one of the selling points for me was Action star Don "The Dragon" Wilson, whose films are somewhat of a blindspot for me. I recall seeing one or two of his movies back in the day, but he's never been an Action star that I've been particularly fond of. Well, after seeing this movie, I'm still not particularly fond of him, but perhaps I just picked a bad place to start. Another selling point was Meg Foster, who I've always been a mild fan of - despite her terrifying eyes - because of her ties to THEY LIVE and MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE (both favorites of mine). Oh, and let's not forget the presence of the late Chris Penn. You'd think he'd be the main "heavy" in this movie, but he actually just plays a henchman who pops up at random times and barely has any lines. Penn's most memorable moment in this is probably when he oversells like a motherfucker during one of his fight scenes.

Speaking of the heavy, the bad guy in this is basically more of a perverted serial killer than the typical corporate villain you'd get in a futuristic dystopia film such as this. He's basically the enforcer for New Body who goes around and rips peoples' hearts out with some sort of claw. At one point it appears as if he violently retrieves a woman's heart through her vagina because of where he places his hand, but I'm pretty sure it's suggested that he enters his victims through the stomach rather than their crotch - although it'd be cool if he actually did tear out hearts through vaginas. Aside from his violent tendencies, the antagonist (whose name I already forgot) is pretty goddamn boring.

This is not the villain (unfortunately)

When it comes to 80s and 90s Sci-Fi movies such as this, I always get a kick out of seeing how these movies portray the future. In this film's version of the future, there are a ludicrous amount of fire barrels on the streets, and of course daylight is pretty much non-existent. The streets in FUTURE KICK may be crime-ridden, but apparently they're very warm due to the excessive amount of fire barrels. Hairstyles and fashion, however, are very much contemporary to the late 80s and early 90s - teased hair, mullets, etc. Also, to establish how crazy it is on Earth, Nancy gets insta-robbed as soon as her feet touch pavement.

I'm pretty forgiving of a bad movie if it feels like there was at least an effort put forth by those involved, from the director to the actors to whoever. I can overlook a lot of flaws and obvious budgetary restraints and poor acting if there's any sign of care put into the product. Unfortunately FUTURE KICK lacks any heart whatsoever. You can tell that the makers of this film just pumped it out to capitalize on whatever trends were popular at the time, be it Action/Sci-Fi or the Virtual Reality craze. But it's not to say that FUTURE KICK is a complete waste of time. If you're a fan of unintentionally hilarious background ADR, you'll probably have a blast watching this movie based on the abundance of laughably-bad ADR alone. There's also a ridiculous amount of padding involving strippers; it seems like every five minutes or so - as if on cue - we get shots of topless women with teased hair and ass-lengthening panties dancing in some strip club. It got to the point where I found myself instinctively pulling folded-up dollar bills out of my pocket and waving them at the TV.

Another surprising element of FUTURE KICK was the violence. I mean it's no CANNIBAL HOLOCAUST or anything like that, but there's some decent gore in this nonetheless, ranging from a decapitation to a headsplosion to a mansplosion, and, of course, hearts getting ripped out like I mentioned earlier. Aside from the abundance of female nudity and absurd violence, though, FUTURE KICK doesn't really have much to offer. You'll get some laughs out of it, but not enough to justify me recommending it as a Saturday night beer-and-pizza movie to watch with friends. The whole Cyberpunk/Dystopia aesthetic is pretty lazy and clearly the result of a minimal budget and the filmmakers not giving a fuck, and the fight choreography and set-pieces are very lackluster. To be fair, though,  this was produced by Roger Corman. As much as we all love Roger, he was (and still is) known for pumping out movies at a fast pace; in 1991 alone, he produced eleven other movies besides this, and FUTURE KICK is certainly a victim of "quantity over quality". Like it or not, FUTURE KICK aims low and more or less hits the target. The fact that the movie, at one point, features an actual montage of - wait for it - strippers and death scenes should give you an idea of what's in store.

Score: 5.5

Tetsuo: The Bullet Man (2009)

Directed by Shinya Tsukamoto. Starring Eric Bossick ("Anthony"), Akiko Monô ("Yuriko"), Yûko Nakamura ("Mitsue"), and Stephen Sarrazin ("Ride"). Not Rated.

Source: Region 1 DVD (IFC/MPI)
Running time: 01:11:21
Country: Japan

THE BULLET MAN is the third film in director Shinya Tsukamoto's TETSUO trilogy, and it revolves around a man named Anthony who begins a grotesque transformation following the death of his son. That's pretty much all the information I got from this movie that wasn't cryptic or symbolic. For those unfamiliar with Tsukamoto's TETSUO films, they're all essentially Body Horror movies that share similar themes of a lead character undergoing a bizarre transformation that sees flesh gradually replaced with metal; men becoming machines, essentially. While I haven't seen the second film in the trilogy, BODY HAMMER, I've done enough reading up on it (thanks, Wikipedia) to know that both sequels are basically re-hashes of the original with little tweaks here and there to make each one stand out from the other.

In BULLET MAN, Anthony's son is killed in a hit and run accident. While his wife openly grieves and wants to avenge their son's death, Anthony is a quiet griever who appears cold and numb in regards to the tragedy. Ironically, the man who apparently doesn't want to resort to violence literally begins to turn into a walking weapon. But this doesn't happen until someone breaks into his home and shoots him in the head. Instead of dying instantly like most people would, this actually marks the beginning of Anthony's transformation. His skin gradually begins to turn into a mound of misshapen black steel, as if the bullet carried a disease that subsequently spread throughout his entire body and produced metallic tumors. As the film progresses, Anthony receives clues and cryptic messages on his computer that point him in the direction of the man who killed his son. Conveniently enough, Anthony is literally turning into a walking firearm.

Initially, the film almost lost me with its dialogue and excessive shaky cam. To be fair, though, the dialogue was written in Japanese and delivered in English, and Tsukamoto (who also stars in the film as "The Guy") is a director who has a tendency to utilize assaulting visuals. BULLET MAN is an experimental film and an inherently divisive one at that, but, for me, as soon as that initial (and mostly uninteresting) hump of character development and set-up was out of the way, I found myself enthralled by the unrelenting imagery and sound that Tsukamoto brings to the table. If there's a film that perfectly captures the essence of industrial horror and the aesthetic of man colliding with machine, it's THE BULLET MAN (same goes for THE IRON MAN and, I'm sure BODY HAMMER).

While the visuals are impressive, the sound design is perhaps the film's strongest area. When the titular Bullet Man emits any noise, it sounds like his voice is made of steel. That probably makes no sense whatsoever, but somehow this was achieved. As far as the visuals, the cinematography is great despite the epileptic camera work and solid gray and black color scheme. With BULLET MAN, you can also expect symbolism and allegory. I haven't read any other reviews of this film, and I don't know if this or any other of Tsukamoto's films have been dissected by someone who's far more qualified to do so, but, to me, the motives behind the killing of Anthony's son seemed irrelevant. The tragedic events in the film seemed like nothing more than a catalyst to awaken something dormant in Anthony - a part of his psyche and soul that needed to be tapped into in order for him to appreciate what he has. But of course this all just speculation and my own interpretation of an Arthouse Horror Film.

So yes, from a visual and aural standpoint, BULLET MAN was stellar in my book. The narrative though? Not so much. And just because it appealed to me in a big way as far as what I particularly look for in Sci-Fi movies and Body Horror, does that mean I'd go out of my way to recommend it? Probably not. As with any piece of art - regardless of how ugly or beautiful it is - it's subjective. For what it's worth, BULLET MAN bears similarities to David Cronenberg's THE FLY in terms of the obvious themes and also how drastic the lead character's transformation is, but this film is otherwise inaccessible to the casual horror fan.

Score: 7

13 Questions: Richard Greenwood Jr.

I was first made aware of this week's 13 Questions guest, Richard "Rick" Greenwood Jr. when a screener for his Zombie short film HINNON VALLEY arrived in the mail some time last year. Despite being kinda tired of the Zombie genre, I was very impressed with the short film and was disappointed to see that the promising horror filmmaker didn't have any feature-length films for me to check out. Well, that's about to change in the coming months when THE WRETCHED is released (you can check out the teaser trailer HERE), which is a period-piece horror film that stars Ashlynn Yennie from THE HUMAN CENTIPEDE. In the meantime, get to know Rick a little better by reading this post!

1. Who are you and where are you from?
I am Richard Greenwood Jr, but prefer Rick. I was born and raised in Burnt Hills New York and now reside in Hollywood California.

2. Where might people know you from?
I am a writer, director, producer and cinematographer. My short film Hinnon Valley, which I wrote, directed and produced appeared in over 25 festivals nationwide and won 13 awards. The film has also just secured distribution with Shorts International. A feature film I was the cinematographer for, 4 Dead Girls: The Soul Eater is now available on iTunes and many other v.o.d. services. My newest project entitled The Wretched, written by Collin Watts and directed by yours truly will be unleashed on the horror circuit within the next few months.

3. When it comes to what you do, who or what are your major influences?
I have a lot of influences in many areas, but as far as film goes I admire directors such as Steven Spielberg, Martin Scorcese, Wes Craven, Clive Barker, Alex Proyas, Frank Capra and Orson Wells just to name a very few. What grabs me about these particular people is how they have sustained while making a quality product through many genres and styles.

4. What four peoples' faces would you put on your own personal Mt. Rushmore?
Wow, thats tough never thought of that before...heres the first four I can think of- Alien, Eric Draven, Pinhead and Kate beckinsale (love her)

5. What's the last album you bought?
Slipknot: All hope is gone

6. What are the last movies you saw in theaters and on DVD/Blu-Ray?
Just saw Oz (ok, not great) and the new Die Hard (awful- a shit stain on the rest of the films) in theaters and on DVD Skyfall (beautifully shot, but shit movie) and I Saw the Devil (absolutely amazing).

7. What's the last podcast you listened to?
Darkest Radio with Darkest Jack and Charred Remains with Char Hardin.

8. What's the last video game you played?
Wow, it's been a very long time- the last video game I played was Syphon Filter 2.

9. What's the last book you read?
Unfortunately I'm not much of a reader- I don't have the time for it and i can never seem to finish when I do. The last book I read completely was Eaters of the Dead by Michael Crichton.

10. What are your favorite sports teams?
I play hockey and used to play football, so those are the only two sports I really follow. Favorite football team is the Dallas Cowboys and hockey is the Detroit Red Wings and the Anaheim Ducks.

11. What cartoon or comic book character can you relate to the most?
Interesting, obviously theres characters we wish we could be like or have the abilities of, but I guess if I had to say one that I thought I was most like would be Spawn.

12. Create a playlist of ten songs that give people an idea of your musical taste.
-"Purity" Slipknot
-"Sunday Morning" Maroon 5
-"Davidian" Machine Head
-"Best Friend" Candlebox
-"Tuesdays Gone" Lynyrd Skynyrd
-"Track 13" Dry Kill Logic
-"Divinity of Loneliness" Section 8
-"Crimson" Edge of Sanity
-"Regular People" Pantera
-"6 Underground" Sneaker Pimps

13. If you could spend the day at an amusement park with one person from the entertainment industry, who would it be and why?
Just to feed my crush, it would be Kate Beckinsale so I can follow her around like an adoring puppy...but for real probably Steven Spielberg, I'd just take notes all day long-haha

LINKS:

IMDB - THE WRETCHED on Facebook

Arcade (1993)

Directed by Albert Pyun. Starring Megan Ward ("Alex Manning"), Peter Billingsley ("Nick"), John de Lancie ("Difford"), and Sharon Farrell ("Alex's mom"). Rated R.

Source: Region 1 DVD (Full Moom/Wizard Entertainment)
Running time: 01:21:10
Country: USA

ARCADE is a Full Moon production that doesn't feature midgets or pint-sized killers for a change. This is a film that's somehow eluded me over the years, and I've actually been looking forward to checking it out despite the fact that I've sort of outgrown these films. I distinctly remember watching quite a few of the Full Moon movies on Cinemax back in the day (around the time that this film came out, actually), and they appealed to me for a lot of reasons. Say what you want about Charles Band (Full Moon's head honcho), but he found a niche and essentially became a Roger Corman-like figure of the straight-to-video market. These films were also the perfect gateway to Horror for curious young people like myself at the time. Mind you, I was a horror fan before the PUPPET MASTER films came into my life, but the accessibility (and abundance) of these films were very beneficial to me as a pre-teen who was hungry for the genre. That said, ARCADE is a movie I've been wanting to see just for the simple fact that it's called ARCADE, and I'm also typically open to seeing Full Moon films that get away from Band's inclination to feature homicidal dolls or puppets.

Unfortunately ARCADE has somewhat of a misleading title, but I'll get to that. Let's start with the lead character, Alex. She's a high-school student full of teen angst, and she sees a psychiatrist to cope with her constant nightmares and the sudden suicide of her mother, not to mention the fact that she lives with her father, who's usually glued to the couch and is insensitive to her needs. Luckily for Alex, she has a tight-knit group of friends (one of whom is played by a young Seth Green) and has a boyfriend named Greg, so at least she won't be slitting her wrists anytime soon. One night, Alex and her friends head out to a local arcade called Dante's Inferno (not the most subtle reference considering how the movie plays out), which is super smokey by the way, where they're given the opportunity to play a new state-of-the-art virtual reality game called Arcade.

How the game works is that someone sits in a chair, and there are doors that basically lock the person inside of the console. From there, the player puts on a helmet and a pair of gloves that allow them to function once they're transported into the virtual reality world of the game. The object, it seems, is for the player to skateboard through a bunch of corridors and dodge weapons that are protruding from the walls. The player then must beat the level before the time runs out, and in the meanwhile they're being pursued by something known as "The Screamer", which is a disembodied skull that has the power to fuck their shit up. So yeah, it doesn't really sound like an exciting game, but, to be fair, it's a "test" version.

Long story short, Alex's boyfriend plays Arcade and is sucked into the game. Alex and her friends think he just bailed from the arcade for whatever reason, but their eyes are eventually opened to the fact that the game has a will (and personality) of its own, so they race against time to defeat the villainous video game to rescue Greg. Meanwhile, a sketchy guy in a suit who represents the company that created Arcade is handing out home versions of the game like candy to any teenager who's interested, which increases the stakes and the overall threat of the game literally consuming anyone who plays it. So, I guess you could say that Greg is like the Princess Toadstool of this movie and Alex is Mario? Anyway, Alex and one of her friends (the only one left who hasn't been eaten by the game) acquire the game's schematics from its regretful creator and are able to find a crack in the game that allows them both to be transported into its world, and what unfolds is a fairly interesting pay-off that's a cross between TRON (on a much, much lesser scale) and the end of HELLBOUND: HELLRAISER II when all the characters end up in Hell.

ARCADE, to me, feels like a bastard child of Wes Craven's filmography, despite the fact that he had nothing to do with it. In a lot of ways, this resembles two of the director's most important films: A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET and SCREAM (which didn't even exist at the time). There's an evil entity that lives within the game, and it speaks to the players in a very confrontational manner - the same way that Freddy Krueger taunted his victims. Alex herself is very much akin to Nancy from ANOES and Sidney from SCREAM, in that she's not glamorous by any means (a typical "Final Girl" trait), she's loyal to her friends, and she's bookish but has rebellious qualities. And, like Sidney, Alex is coming to terms with the death of her mother. Plus, the characters are upper middle-class suburbanites, and Alex's boyfriend is essentially killed off early in the film just like Johnny Depp in ANOES (spoiler alert!). It should be said, though, that these are all just merely observations on my part and not me trying to suggest that ARCADE is on the same level as any of the aforementioned films.

When it's all said and done, ARCADE seems a bit too ambitious for its budget. The special effects are inherently very dated, but there's nothing that can be done about that. Unfortunately, it's a product of its time as far as the technology goes, so you just have to accept it for what it is. The main problem with the movie is that it's simply kinda boring. ARCADE is only eighty minutes, but it's a long eighty minutes due to bad pacing and the overall blandness of the film. It's about as cinematic as an After School Special. In all seriousness, though, I have to applaud the cast and crew for the effort they put into this movie. I think the intentions were there to make something special, but, again, it was perhaps too ambitious given the resources (or lack thereof) that the producers and the majestically-mulleted director, Albert Pyun (CYBORG), were provided with to make it.

On the plus side, I liked Alex as a character, and I was really surprised by the soundtrack, which mostly consisted of generic-sounding Post-Punk; upon investigating the closing credits, I was impressed to see that the film utilized a song by Blue Oyster Cult. Another thing worth noting is that there's an out-of-left-field sequence towards the end that I found to be chilling and quite disturbing. Yikes. Had the film ended there, I'd be holding ARCADE in higher regard since I'm a sucker for bleak endings, but alas they decided reel everything back in and go with something a little more traditional, resulting in a film that ends about two-minutes too late in my opinion. Finally, as I alluded to earlier, there's a disappointing lack of actual arcades in this movie, and the title is a reference to a game rather than a neon-lit gathering place for young people with pockets full of quarters. As much as this movie has stuck with me, I wouldn't recommend it. You want arcades? Check out JOYSTICKS. You want killer video games? Check out BRAINSCAN or the Emilio Estevez segment in NIGHTMARES.

For a much more well-written review of ARCADE, check out Todd's at the GBTMC.

Score: 5